My daughter is on to a new chapter of her life today. The college years. I am, of course, excited and proud of her, but struggling with the idea that she won't be a regular part of my life anymore - though, of course, she and her brother are always on my mind, as Willie Nelson might say.
It's going to be thrilling to see how she grows - I expect by leaps and bounds. This growth is going to come from facing and handling challenges, mainly on her own. I am comforted by the idea that she is going to be at Gallaudet with a group of kids that she knows well, having grown up with them at the California School for the Deaf - Fremont.
Getting a college education in the capital of the US and being exposed to all the East Coast has to offer is a terrific opportunity. She is also getting the chance to make new friends from Deaf kids from all over the country as well as the world. This is seriously cool stuff.
I hope she has the time of her life....I hope I can stand not having her around to tease, to kiss, to hug, to argue with, to be inspired by, to laugh with, to play with, to parent, to love...
Here a little video of how Miranda and I celebrated her birthday yesterday and said good bye to her childhood:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6ovACGoz-Y
Thursday, August 20, 2009
Sunday, August 16, 2009
Afternoon Shopping
Okay, I'm not big into shopping. No big surprise, but I thought I should take my daughter out to buy a fall jacket or some boots or a laptop bag or all of the above because I know she's going to need these items for her first semester at Gallaudet University. Plus, it's Miranda's birthday on Wednesday and she turns 18, so I thought this mini-shopping spree could be considered birthday gifts.
However, visits to two shopping centers and multiple big and small stores rendered no purchases, other than a green tea ice cream cone. Miranda didn't like any thing we found. Most often saying that's for "old ladies." She tried to talk me into visiting Ross for Less at the Fremont Hub, but I can't handle Ross on a Sunday, especially after all the shopping we'd already done. So we compromised. We went to the Olive Garden for dinner and had a nice meal.
The best part of our time together was watching American's Funniest Videos...A show that been on virtually her entire life and has always been fun to watch together as a family. It's a very Deaf friendly show. Miranda never fails to laugh at the misadventures of cats, dogs, and kids displayed on the show....and it warms my heart to the core to see her so full of joy.
Now, I'm down to one more visit with Miranda before she leaves for Washington, DC (stopping for a visit in Toronto to see her grandparents before she begins college).
However, visits to two shopping centers and multiple big and small stores rendered no purchases, other than a green tea ice cream cone. Miranda didn't like any thing we found. Most often saying that's for "old ladies." She tried to talk me into visiting Ross for Less at the Fremont Hub, but I can't handle Ross on a Sunday, especially after all the shopping we'd already done. So we compromised. We went to the Olive Garden for dinner and had a nice meal.
The best part of our time together was watching American's Funniest Videos...A show that been on virtually her entire life and has always been fun to watch together as a family. It's a very Deaf friendly show. Miranda never fails to laugh at the misadventures of cats, dogs, and kids displayed on the show....and it warms my heart to the core to see her so full of joy.
Now, I'm down to one more visit with Miranda before she leaves for Washington, DC (stopping for a visit in Toronto to see her grandparents before she begins college).
Thursday, August 13, 2009
A Week from Today...
In a week, my daughter will fly with her mother and brother from Northern California to Toronto, where she was born and spent the first five years of her life. Then a week later she will go to Washington, DC to begin her life as a college student at Gallaudet University. This is going to be a big transition for her and for her family.
After 13 years at the California School for the Deaf, my Miranda is following the path to higher education that we've imagine for her entire childhood. It's hard to believe it's finally happening. It's a time of milestones for her: graduating high school, turning 18, and going off to college. She is excited and nervous - let's call it "excitous." And I'm happy for her and proud of her, but dreading the idea of only seeing her a few times a year. I'm a dad who is "gladsad."
After 13 years at the California School for the Deaf, my Miranda is following the path to higher education that we've imagine for her entire childhood. It's hard to believe it's finally happening. It's a time of milestones for her: graduating high school, turning 18, and going off to college. She is excited and nervous - let's call it "excitous." And I'm happy for her and proud of her, but dreading the idea of only seeing her a few times a year. I'm a dad who is "gladsad."
Thursday, July 16, 2009
A Mundane but Lovely Evening...
I forgot what used to be normal for me. Coming home from a long day of work and seeing my little kids. Rarely was I greeted like the "conqueroring hero" but I was greeted by smiling, often dirty, but very cute faces. Now, that they're older and live with their mom, I don't have this experience...funny how it slips away, these times and you don't even know that they've left until you get a sweet reminder.
All that to say, it was really nice to come home tonight and find my daughter Miranda relaxing on my couch watching a DVD on the TV. I got a nice smile from a cute face that wasn't the least bit dirty, framed by blonde locks.
We had a plan to play some basketball and then come home for burritos for dinner. So I dashed upstairs and changed into shorts and put on my new basketball shoes. Miranda flipped off her sandals and jumped into her old basketball shoes - that I teased her, saying they still looked like new. She confessed she hadn't worn them or played basketball in a couple of years. I loved watching her play on the CSDF girls' teams in junior high and her freshman and sophomore years high school. She wasn't talented but she was tenacious with good anticipation. Her last two years of high school, she chose to do acting in the school's spring play instead of playing hoop. Being a theatre person, I really enjoyed see her work on stage, too.
So as I was shooting around with her on a school blacktop, I asked which she preferred, "Drama or basketball." She shrugged and said she didn't know. I was surprised. I thought she would have picked drama because she had so much fun and did so well. She said, "I miss playing defense." I laughed. She's only 5'3" and I told her she was too short to play basketball. Then I asked her why she was so short...as if she could have done something about it. She pointed the finger back at me. "It's your family's fault!" She said something to the effect of I got my blond hair from my mother and everything else from you. Okay.
While we continued to just shoot around, we chatted about college life and Gallaudet. I warned her that she might gain weight when she goes away to school. She said she knew about the freshman 15 pounds. Then she told me she didn't like Gallaudet U's cafeteria food. She said it wasn't as healthy as CSDF. She knows because she's stayed in Gallaudet's dorms 3 times for the Hoy and Clerc tournaments and a volleyball camp she attended. It's kind of a relief knowing she knows the campus somewhat already. In six weeks or so, it will be her home away from home.
I asked her if she cried when her boyfriend left on Tuesday for his parents' home in Minnesota. She said she did. I couldn't resist another tease. "You're a big baby!" She laughed and said she wasn't...my big baby signs turned into an African dance she once did on stage at CSDF years ago. She laughed at me again.
Tonight's malaprop - when trying to sign "goat" I signed something quite bizarre that had Miranda scrunching up her face with wonderment. When I fingerspelled "goat", she signed it correctly and we both laughed at how far off I was from signing it. Oh, well, goat doesn't come up often in my limited ASL conversations, so I tend to forget those types of words, but I think I remember and invariably then end up signing something extremely ridiculous. Oh, well, such is my daughter's cross to bear: she has a ASL-challenged, stupid hearing Dad.
After awhile Miranda said she was tired and hungry so we came home for dinner. I made some burritos and she actually liked them. No complaints, even though I didn't have all the condiments that are usually provided at her mother's house: namely salsa and sour cream.
It was a really nice, quiet, mundane evening...I know I'm going wish I had a few more like these come September.
All that to say, it was really nice to come home tonight and find my daughter Miranda relaxing on my couch watching a DVD on the TV. I got a nice smile from a cute face that wasn't the least bit dirty, framed by blonde locks.
We had a plan to play some basketball and then come home for burritos for dinner. So I dashed upstairs and changed into shorts and put on my new basketball shoes. Miranda flipped off her sandals and jumped into her old basketball shoes - that I teased her, saying they still looked like new. She confessed she hadn't worn them or played basketball in a couple of years. I loved watching her play on the CSDF girls' teams in junior high and her freshman and sophomore years high school. She wasn't talented but she was tenacious with good anticipation. Her last two years of high school, she chose to do acting in the school's spring play instead of playing hoop. Being a theatre person, I really enjoyed see her work on stage, too.
So as I was shooting around with her on a school blacktop, I asked which she preferred, "Drama or basketball." She shrugged and said she didn't know. I was surprised. I thought she would have picked drama because she had so much fun and did so well. She said, "I miss playing defense." I laughed. She's only 5'3" and I told her she was too short to play basketball. Then I asked her why she was so short...as if she could have done something about it. She pointed the finger back at me. "It's your family's fault!" She said something to the effect of I got my blond hair from my mother and everything else from you. Okay.
While we continued to just shoot around, we chatted about college life and Gallaudet. I warned her that she might gain weight when she goes away to school. She said she knew about the freshman 15 pounds. Then she told me she didn't like Gallaudet U's cafeteria food. She said it wasn't as healthy as CSDF. She knows because she's stayed in Gallaudet's dorms 3 times for the Hoy and Clerc tournaments and a volleyball camp she attended. It's kind of a relief knowing she knows the campus somewhat already. In six weeks or so, it will be her home away from home.
I asked her if she cried when her boyfriend left on Tuesday for his parents' home in Minnesota. She said she did. I couldn't resist another tease. "You're a big baby!" She laughed and said she wasn't...my big baby signs turned into an African dance she once did on stage at CSDF years ago. She laughed at me again.
Tonight's malaprop - when trying to sign "goat" I signed something quite bizarre that had Miranda scrunching up her face with wonderment. When I fingerspelled "goat", she signed it correctly and we both laughed at how far off I was from signing it. Oh, well, goat doesn't come up often in my limited ASL conversations, so I tend to forget those types of words, but I think I remember and invariably then end up signing something extremely ridiculous. Oh, well, such is my daughter's cross to bear: she has a ASL-challenged, stupid hearing Dad.
After awhile Miranda said she was tired and hungry so we came home for dinner. I made some burritos and she actually liked them. No complaints, even though I didn't have all the condiments that are usually provided at her mother's house: namely salsa and sour cream.
It was a really nice, quiet, mundane evening...I know I'm going wish I had a few more like these come September.
Monday, July 13, 2009
Bowling
One of the great activities that Deaf and hearing families and friends can participate in together without a problem (stress, intervention, hassle) is bowling.
Yesterday, we celebrated cousin Giovanni's birthday with a little bowling at Mowry Lanes in Fremont. It can be a little pricey with shoe rental now at $4 a pair and $3 or $4 a person per game, but I usually go with a 99-cents-per-game-for-10-games coupon. Depending upon how many people go, it can be around $25 for a couple of hours of entertainment.
Both my kids were in bowling leagues when they were younger and they still enjoy rolling the rock, though Miranda gets bored with it relatively quickly. She invariably starts acting silly after only a few frames. Yesterday, she had her boyfriend Dack as a teammate. The silliness was only delayed a couple of frames. They had their share of gutter balls, but I don't think they were too concerned about winning.
Miranda had the honor of rolling the first strike of the day and she let us all know it. Unfortunately, it was also her only strike of the day. Not that she really cared that much. View it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jleSXuR6lwc
Yesterday, we celebrated cousin Giovanni's birthday with a little bowling at Mowry Lanes in Fremont. It can be a little pricey with shoe rental now at $4 a pair and $3 or $4 a person per game, but I usually go with a 99-cents-per-game-for-10-games coupon. Depending upon how many people go, it can be around $25 for a couple of hours of entertainment.
Both my kids were in bowling leagues when they were younger and they still enjoy rolling the rock, though Miranda gets bored with it relatively quickly. She invariably starts acting silly after only a few frames. Yesterday, she had her boyfriend Dack as a teammate. The silliness was only delayed a couple of frames. They had their share of gutter balls, but I don't think they were too concerned about winning.
Miranda had the honor of rolling the first strike of the day and she let us all know it. Unfortunately, it was also her only strike of the day. Not that she really cared that much. View it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jleSXuR6lwc
Saturday, July 4, 2009
Summer Days
It's been three weeks since she graduated high school and Miranda has stayed busy. The first week she worked at CSDF as part of the annual end of the year clean-up crew. Then she spent the second week hanging out with her boyfriend Dack and getting her four wisdom teeth removed.
The past week was spent recovering from wisdom teeth removal. She showed me the 4 removed teeth and that totally grossed me out. One evening when her cheeks were still swollen, I took her to Jamba Juice for "dinner."
On Wednesday eve when she was feeling almost fully recovered from her wisdom teeth extraction, I drove Miranda and Dack to Stoneridge Mall to "window shop" at the Apple Store. I had agreed to buy her a MacBook for a graduation gift and because she'd need one for college. [I videotaped some of our experience using her graduation gift to myself - a Flip camcorder. I made it into a little movie using the Flip software that came with it. For $200, this is a killer product that makes video so much easier. And the quality's excellent. Check it out on YouTube here: http://www.youtube.com/user/PsychicRich#play/all/uploads-all/0/6VcpmqY5Wvc]
I wasn't really planning to buy the laptop yet, because I wanted to shop around, but my Apple-expert friend said there weren't really any better deals than the $50 college student discount Apple was offering. In addition to that, Apple was also offering college students a "free" iPod Touch with the purchase of a laptop. So needless to say Apple got my credit card and we left the store (as documented) with both a new MacBook and an iPod Touch.
I was skeptcial about how useful an iPod would be to my deaf daughter, but she showed me there were lots of other features on the Touch version in addition to iTunes...photos, games, etc. I figured she could at least share it with her brother...that was he's expectation too, when he found out about it. His enthusiasm is tempered by his life experience with her though, "You know, how she is sometimes...'Mine!'" I had to laugh at that. This is true... They may be adults but your kids are still kids, sometimes, eh?
Next week Randi goes back to CSDF to work as an aide for summer school...And next month, August 19 she turns 18 and then around August 25, she goes to Washington, DC to begin her college career. No, I'm not ready yet to believe that's actually going to happen.
The past week was spent recovering from wisdom teeth removal. She showed me the 4 removed teeth and that totally grossed me out. One evening when her cheeks were still swollen, I took her to Jamba Juice for "dinner."
On Wednesday eve when she was feeling almost fully recovered from her wisdom teeth extraction, I drove Miranda and Dack to Stoneridge Mall to "window shop" at the Apple Store. I had agreed to buy her a MacBook for a graduation gift and because she'd need one for college. [I videotaped some of our experience using her graduation gift to myself - a Flip camcorder. I made it into a little movie using the Flip software that came with it. For $200, this is a killer product that makes video so much easier. And the quality's excellent. Check it out on YouTube here: http://www.youtube.com/user/PsychicRich#play/all/uploads-all/0/6VcpmqY5Wvc]
I wasn't really planning to buy the laptop yet, because I wanted to shop around, but my Apple-expert friend said there weren't really any better deals than the $50 college student discount Apple was offering. In addition to that, Apple was also offering college students a "free" iPod Touch with the purchase of a laptop. So needless to say Apple got my credit card and we left the store (as documented) with both a new MacBook and an iPod Touch.
I was skeptcial about how useful an iPod would be to my deaf daughter, but she showed me there were lots of other features on the Touch version in addition to iTunes...photos, games, etc. I figured she could at least share it with her brother...that was he's expectation too, when he found out about it. His enthusiasm is tempered by his life experience with her though, "You know, how she is sometimes...'Mine!'" I had to laugh at that. This is true... They may be adults but your kids are still kids, sometimes, eh?
Next week Randi goes back to CSDF to work as an aide for summer school...And next month, August 19 she turns 18 and then around August 25, she goes to Washington, DC to begin her college career. No, I'm not ready yet to believe that's actually going to happen.
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Father's Day Make-Up
Life is filled with ups and downs...and this past weekend was kind of a downer. The previous weekend was filled with joy and pride as my Miranda graduated high school with a flourish. I had expectations that this weekend would be nice too, with the celebration of Father's Day.
Well, I guess the best way to describe this past Sunday was a day for learning...or an opportunity to learn. I don't want to get into the details, but I was very disappointed that I did not see my kids until very late in the day. They made some choices and perhaps had good intentions but things didn't pan out the way any of us had hoped.
I know teenagers are infamous for their self-centeredness and it's just a stage they all go through, but that doesn't mean you can't call them on it. Make them aware, that "Hey, it's Father's Day!" I only have expectations from my kids 3 days out of the year: Christmas, Father's Day and my birthday. If they can't pull it together on those 3 days, then I feel obligated to remind them that I have to be a "priority" with them or I'm going to be really annoyed (code for the seemingly unmanly "hurt feelings.")
Let's just say that Father's Day gave me the opportunity to remind the kids of one of my favorite lessons: that life will go a lot better for them if they "do what the NEED to do FIRST, and what the WANT to do SECOND."
I was happy to smooth things over with my son Terence that night. And happy that Miranda texted me yesterday to say she was "sorry for what happened." This evening Miranda made up for the Father's Day slight be making me a home-made pizza from scratch. And we enjoyed the delicious chocolate cake Terence made for me for dessert. So all's forgiven...
While eating, Miranda informed me that she has been assigned a dorm room at Gallaudet University. Oh, yes, that's looming out there...my little girl going away...She has also decided on what kind of laptop she wants as a graduation gift...MacBook. Oy! I don't want to think about her going away yet...
Tomorrow, Miranda goes in for oral surgery. She's having four wisdom teeth removed. She is a little nervous about being put under. Here's hoping she doesn't suffer too much. She is excited about having an excuse to eat lots of ice cream, yogurt and jello...
Well, I guess the best way to describe this past Sunday was a day for learning...or an opportunity to learn. I don't want to get into the details, but I was very disappointed that I did not see my kids until very late in the day. They made some choices and perhaps had good intentions but things didn't pan out the way any of us had hoped.
I know teenagers are infamous for their self-centeredness and it's just a stage they all go through, but that doesn't mean you can't call them on it. Make them aware, that "Hey, it's Father's Day!" I only have expectations from my kids 3 days out of the year: Christmas, Father's Day and my birthday. If they can't pull it together on those 3 days, then I feel obligated to remind them that I have to be a "priority" with them or I'm going to be really annoyed (code for the seemingly unmanly "hurt feelings.")
Let's just say that Father's Day gave me the opportunity to remind the kids of one of my favorite lessons: that life will go a lot better for them if they "do what the NEED to do FIRST, and what the WANT to do SECOND."
I was happy to smooth things over with my son Terence that night. And happy that Miranda texted me yesterday to say she was "sorry for what happened." This evening Miranda made up for the Father's Day slight be making me a home-made pizza from scratch. And we enjoyed the delicious chocolate cake Terence made for me for dessert. So all's forgiven...
While eating, Miranda informed me that she has been assigned a dorm room at Gallaudet University. Oh, yes, that's looming out there...my little girl going away...She has also decided on what kind of laptop she wants as a graduation gift...MacBook. Oy! I don't want to think about her going away yet...
Tomorrow, Miranda goes in for oral surgery. She's having four wisdom teeth removed. She is a little nervous about being put under. Here's hoping she doesn't suffer too much. She is excited about having an excuse to eat lots of ice cream, yogurt and jello...
Saturday, June 20, 2009
A Week After G-Day
Wow. The past week has flown by...Just like the past 13 years in Fremont. Graduations are milestones that invite looking back. It was a real treat to see Hedy Udkovich Stern at the ceremony last Friday and receive a touching email from her yesterday. Hedy is now based in Santa Fe, New Mexico where her husband Ron is the superintendent of the New Mexico School for the Deaf.
Before moving there several years ago - maybe more than several now - Hedy worked in the California School for the Deaf's Outreach Department and was the person who gave me my first tour of the school and a year later gave my daughter Miranda, her mother Brenda and hergrandmother Barbara their tour.
Hedy was a wonderful first impression of CSDF and was helpful getting us settled when we made the decision to move from Toronto, Ontario to the Bay Area. So it was quite appropriate to see her in the audience last Friday, though she had come for a retirement party for a couple of long time CSDF teachers and friends, not the graduation. It was just a lucky coincidence.
In her email of yesterday, Hedy wrote how she still vividly recalls 4-year-old Miranda and the early years at CSDF and how amazing it was to see"this poised lovely young Lady standing in front of me." She was "thrilled" that Miranda waved to her after coming down off the stage following her speech. Honestly, I was thrilled to see my daughter make repeated trips to the podium on the stage. I wish I could take credit for her accomplishments, but it was all her own initiative.
Before moving there several years ago - maybe more than several now - Hedy worked in the California School for the Deaf's Outreach Department and was the person who gave me my first tour of the school and a year later gave my daughter Miranda, her mother Brenda and hergrandmother Barbara their tour.
Hedy was a wonderful first impression of CSDF and was helpful getting us settled when we made the decision to move from Toronto, Ontario to the Bay Area. So it was quite appropriate to see her in the audience last Friday, though she had come for a retirement party for a couple of long time CSDF teachers and friends, not the graduation. It was just a lucky coincidence.
In her email of yesterday, Hedy wrote how she still vividly recalls 4-year-old Miranda and the early years at CSDF and how amazing it was to see"this poised lovely young Lady standing in front of me." She was "thrilled" that Miranda waved to her after coming down off the stage following her speech. Honestly, I was thrilled to see my daughter make repeated trips to the podium on the stage. I wish I could take credit for her accomplishments, but it was all her own initiative.
Here I am showing Miranda that I'm wearing the tie she gave me for Christmas at her graduation ceremony. The blue and golden colors of the tie are the same colors of her future university. She responded, "You're ready for Gallaudet!" I didn't think of it then, but I can say now, "And so are you, my dear!"
So with Father's Day tomorrow, I can tell you I feel very, very lucky to have two great kids who have handled life's challenges pretty well and will continue to face them without giving up. This is the best gift any Dad could ever want, knowing his kids are good people and can do it without him.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Miranda's Graduation
A Great Day at the California School for the Deaf - Fremont - 6/12/09
It was a great afternoon and evening for the Medugno -Paddon family at CSDF on Friday, June 12, 2009.
My daughter Miranda made us all proud of her accomplishments in 13 years at the school. It all came together for us on that Friday with her speech and receiving scholarships. As superintendent Dr. Hank Klopping said, "She got a good education." I agreed with him whole-heartedly.
When Hank went on to say, "Your family gave up a lot for her to be here, I know," I responded, "Yes, we did. But it was worth it. She made the most of it."
In addition to getting a Gallaudet University scholarship, Miranda earned the Visual and Performing Arts Scholarship and an Adelaide Boren Scholarship, that were presented by Dean fo Students, Ethan Bernstein and Dr. Klopping, respectively.
Watch Miranda's graduation ceremony speech on YouTube with voice interpretation here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1yTafvWvnA 
It was a great afternoon and evening for the Medugno -Paddon family at CSDF on Friday, June 12, 2009.My daughter Miranda made us all proud of her accomplishments in 13 years at the school. It all came together for us on that Friday with her speech and receiving scholarships. As superintendent Dr. Hank Klopping said, "She got a good education." I agreed with him whole-heartedly.
When Hank went on to say, "Your family gave up a lot for her to be here, I know," I responded, "Yes, we did. But it was worth it. She made the most of it."
In addition to getting a Gallaudet University scholarship, Miranda earned the Visual and Performing Arts Scholarship and an Adelaide Boren Scholarship, that were presented by Dean fo Students, Ethan Bernstein and Dr. Klopping, respectively.
Watch Miranda's graduation ceremony speech on YouTube with voice interpretation here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j1yTafvWvnA
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Awards Night at CSDF
It was nice to go to the California School for the Deaf last night and sit between my mother and ex-wife to see Miranda receive two awards for her school work. One for Social Studies from her teacher Molly Christensen and one for Graphic Arts from her teacher Maureen Klusza.
(Check out the Flip camcorder footage of Ms. Klusza's presentation where she reveals a secret here: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KIAxbaNGX6w )
It was also a bittersweet evening, knowing this would the last awards ceremony for Miranda as a student...and now there's only one more day left. The graduation ceremony and the party tomorrow. Wow. It's been a long, 13-year, wonderful experience CSDF. Thanks for the memories!
Here's of photo from last night of Randi with her Nana and me:
Good times!
Monday, June 8, 2009
Miranda's Speech
My daughter is one of two students giving a speech to her class of 2009 at their graduation this week. She worked hard on Friday night and used the Internet for tips to write her speech. She emailed me it on Saturday and I was pleased with how sophisticated and well thought out it was.
She asked me for feedback. I suggested a few things like "how about mentioning me." She laughed and said she wasn't going to single anyone out. I guess my fragile ego can handle that.
She is going to work with Rory Osbrink at CSDF to translate into ASL this week. I can't wait to see her presentation on Friday, June 12th at 3pm. In the mean time, I am searching for a graduation gift that she doesn't know what it is, but has asked if she can return it, if she doesn't like it. She still hasn't forgiven me for buying her those binoculars for Christmas a few years back.
She asked me for feedback. I suggested a few things like "how about mentioning me." She laughed and said she wasn't going to single anyone out. I guess my fragile ego can handle that.
She is going to work with Rory Osbrink at CSDF to translate into ASL this week. I can't wait to see her presentation on Friday, June 12th at 3pm. In the mean time, I am searching for a graduation gift that she doesn't know what it is, but has asked if she can return it, if she doesn't like it. She still hasn't forgiven me for buying her those binoculars for Christmas a few years back.
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Games for Deaf and Hearing Kids
Games for Deaf and Hearing Kids to Play Together Successfully
With a little supervision and appropriate games, playtime can be successful, serving as an ice-breaker and helping lay the groundwork for better and richer relationship between deaf and hearing children (sibling, relations, neighbors).
Check out my article here:
http://hubpages.com/hub/Deaf-Children?comment=1176158
This article is from the appendix from my book "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father" ©2005
http://gupress.gallaudet.edu/bookpage/DDHFbookpage.html
With a little supervision and appropriate games, playtime can be successful, serving as an ice-breaker and helping lay the groundwork for better and richer relationship between deaf and hearing children (sibling, relations, neighbors).
Check out my article here:
http://hubpages.com/hub/Deaf-Children?comment=1176158
This article is from the appendix from my book "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father" ©2005
http://gupress.gallaudet.edu/bookpage/DDHFbookpage.html
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
About.com Guide Jamie Berke's Blog
Here's what Jamie wrote in her blog regarding my book "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father":
"Just in time for beach season, a review of the book Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father. In many ways, it is similar to yet the opposite of the classic Deaf Like Me from long ago. In this more modern version, the parents quickly select sign language as the communication method of choice, and their deaf daughter thrives. "
You can read her full review here: http://deafness.about.com/od/families/fr/deafdaughter.htm
"Just in time for beach season, a review of the book Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father. In many ways, it is similar to yet the opposite of the classic Deaf Like Me from long ago. In this more modern version, the parents quickly select sign language as the communication method of choice, and their deaf daughter thrives. "
You can read her full review here: http://deafness.about.com/od/families/fr/deafdaughter.htm
Sunday, May 24, 2009
"Deaf Politician" Manuscript Now Available Online
I came across a new web service called Scribd! that allows you to post unpublished documents and works on their site and sell them for a small price.
So today I posted my 70,000 word biography on about Gary Malkowski on Scribd! Anyone who is interested can now download a 102-page PDF of "Deaf Politician - The Gary Malkowski Story" for $5.
I finished the original manuscript in 1998, 3 years after Gary left office. I did some revisions in 2003. Anyone interested in Deaf Culture, Deaf role models and leaders should have a gander. Gary's story is very inspirational, especially for hearing parents of deaf children like me.
I've put up a few pages that can be previewed before purchasing. Check them out here:
http://www.scribd.com/doc/15770705/Deaf-Politician-The-Gary-Malkowski-Story-by-Richard-Medugno#document_metadata
So today I posted my 70,000 word biography on about Gary Malkowski on Scribd! Anyone who is interested can now download a 102-page PDF of "Deaf Politician - The Gary Malkowski Story" for $5.
I finished the original manuscript in 1998, 3 years after Gary left office. I did some revisions in 2003. Anyone interested in Deaf Culture, Deaf role models and leaders should have a gander. Gary's story is very inspirational, especially for hearing parents of deaf children like me.
I've put up a few pages that can be previewed before purchasing. Check them out here:
http://www.scribd.com/doc/15770705/Deaf-Politician-The-Gary-Malkowski-Story-by-Richard-Medugno#document_metadata
Book Review of "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father"
Check out Jamie Berke's review of my book at:http://deafness.about.com/od/families/fr/deafdaughter.htm
Per Jamie's request, below is a reprint of an editorial I wrote for the Cal News (CSD Fremont's newsletter). It appeared in the February 20, 1998 issue.
Learning ASL is a Must!
by CSD parent Richard Medugno
I was asked by Cal News some time ago to write an article explaining to parents of deaf children why they should learn ASL. I have found any attempt tow rite such an article nearly impossible, not because I don't agree with the idea. I have been signing with my 6 1/2 year-old daughter for 5 years no and enjoy a rich, rewarding relationship with her and many of the deaf people I have come in contact with. My problem is how can I write an article about something that is so self-evident? It's like trying to explain why an American child should learn the English alphabet.
So instead of an article, I will offer an analogy:
Trying to parent and teach a deaf child without using sign language would be like trying to drive a car without a steering wheel and a stick shift (no automatics in this arena). You may get somewhere, but not very quickly, and you will surely go in circles and bump into a lot of barriers along the way. That's a scary ride that too many deaf children and their hearing parents have been advised to take int he past.
Cal News staff say there are still many parents with kids at CSDF who don't sign or don't see the need to learn. If there are parents who subscribe to this notion, I respectfully suggest: Give it a try; the benefits will become clear. You have the perfect opportunity to start as CSDF's free, 10-weeks ASL classes for parents and siblings beings again...For two hours on Thursday evenings, parents and siblings learn with their peers. The classes are taught by three of the most dedicated, warm, fun and friendly ASL teachers you could ever find.
I would also respectfully offeer that parents who go to ASL classes should go with the proper attitude and respect for these instructors and the subject they are teaching. Too many times I have witnessed individuals with disrepectful behavior toward ASl, the teachers, and their lesson plans.
Too often I have seen students second-guess a teacher's use of a sign or decline to participate in an activity that would help them learn the language. They ask questions like, "Why is that the sign?" or "Why are we doing this?" or "Why don't they use English structure and word order?" They will also refuse to participate when called upon. If I had questioned one of my college professors like this, I am sure I would have been verbally ripped to pieces and unceremoniously bounced out of the call. Yet, ASL teachers politely respond or smile and shrug, tolerating it. Imagine going to a French class and asking, "Why do the French use all these different words in different word order?" Just accept it! ASL is a different language. Don't try to change or fight it, just learn it.
Every ASL class I have been to, whether at CSDF or at other locales, the teacher always had two requests: 1) that people never use their voices and 2) that people ask the teacher if they have a question. Invariably there are students who just don't "get it" and insist on talking, chatting, voice interpreting (often incorrectly) and asking their neighbhor to "interpret" for them, instead of asking the insturctor for clarification.
This behavior is doubly rude because often the deaf instructor is not aware that chattering is going on. Then the hearing student who is desperately trying to concentrate has to be the "talk police" and "shhh!" the distracters or bring it to the teacher's attention. I promise you, the less you talk, the better you wil learn to sign. And your classmates will, too.
So join us at ASL class, but don't come unless you want to learn and are willing to respect the pursuit, the language, and the instructor. These classes can be good opportunities to socalize, but remember that what you are doing is vitally important, and it will provide your deaf child with an avenue of clear, fluid communication with the people that love him or her most.
Hard to believe I wrote this 11 years ago....and it still needs to be said today...
Per Jamie's request, below is a reprint of an editorial I wrote for the Cal News (CSD Fremont's newsletter). It appeared in the February 20, 1998 issue.
Learning ASL is a Must!
by CSD parent Richard Medugno
I was asked by Cal News some time ago to write an article explaining to parents of deaf children why they should learn ASL. I have found any attempt tow rite such an article nearly impossible, not because I don't agree with the idea. I have been signing with my 6 1/2 year-old daughter for 5 years no and enjoy a rich, rewarding relationship with her and many of the deaf people I have come in contact with. My problem is how can I write an article about something that is so self-evident? It's like trying to explain why an American child should learn the English alphabet.
So instead of an article, I will offer an analogy:
Trying to parent and teach a deaf child without using sign language would be like trying to drive a car without a steering wheel and a stick shift (no automatics in this arena). You may get somewhere, but not very quickly, and you will surely go in circles and bump into a lot of barriers along the way. That's a scary ride that too many deaf children and their hearing parents have been advised to take int he past.
Cal News staff say there are still many parents with kids at CSDF who don't sign or don't see the need to learn. If there are parents who subscribe to this notion, I respectfully suggest: Give it a try; the benefits will become clear. You have the perfect opportunity to start as CSDF's free, 10-weeks ASL classes for parents and siblings beings again...For two hours on Thursday evenings, parents and siblings learn with their peers. The classes are taught by three of the most dedicated, warm, fun and friendly ASL teachers you could ever find.
I would also respectfully offeer that parents who go to ASL classes should go with the proper attitude and respect for these instructors and the subject they are teaching. Too many times I have witnessed individuals with disrepectful behavior toward ASl, the teachers, and their lesson plans.
Too often I have seen students second-guess a teacher's use of a sign or decline to participate in an activity that would help them learn the language. They ask questions like, "Why is that the sign?" or "Why are we doing this?" or "Why don't they use English structure and word order?" They will also refuse to participate when called upon. If I had questioned one of my college professors like this, I am sure I would have been verbally ripped to pieces and unceremoniously bounced out of the call. Yet, ASL teachers politely respond or smile and shrug, tolerating it. Imagine going to a French class and asking, "Why do the French use all these different words in different word order?" Just accept it! ASL is a different language. Don't try to change or fight it, just learn it.
Every ASL class I have been to, whether at CSDF or at other locales, the teacher always had two requests: 1) that people never use their voices and 2) that people ask the teacher if they have a question. Invariably there are students who just don't "get it" and insist on talking, chatting, voice interpreting (often incorrectly) and asking their neighbhor to "interpret" for them, instead of asking the insturctor for clarification.
This behavior is doubly rude because often the deaf instructor is not aware that chattering is going on. Then the hearing student who is desperately trying to concentrate has to be the "talk police" and "shhh!" the distracters or bring it to the teacher's attention. I promise you, the less you talk, the better you wil learn to sign. And your classmates will, too.
So join us at ASL class, but don't come unless you want to learn and are willing to respect the pursuit, the language, and the instructor. These classes can be good opportunities to socalize, but remember that what you are doing is vitally important, and it will provide your deaf child with an avenue of clear, fluid communication with the people that love him or her most.
Hard to believe I wrote this 11 years ago....and it still needs to be said today...
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Miranda to Give Speech at Her Graduation
The email from Charles Farr arrived unexpectedly and seemingly with some urgency. The subject line was simply "Randi."Charles Farr is the principal at the Califronia School for the Deaf's Career Technical Education department and a friend of mine. He is a graduate of Gallaudet University and a mutual friend of Gary Malkowski, Canada's Deaf Politician, who befriended my family and me before we moved to Fremont 13 years ago. I got to know Charles over the years and enjoyed his sense of humor. Playing with him the Deaf adults soccer team for a few years was a real treat.
So an email from Charles wasn't totally out of the blue, but I immediately assumed something bad had happened. He had written, "Could you please call me at your earliest convenience?" I jumped to the conclusion that Miranda had been hurt in an accident or had pulled some kind of senior prank.
Since I wa at work, I dialed the VRS relay number and when they tried to reach Charles' videophone, it was busy. I sent Miranda a text message asking her, "What's up?" Then I called her mother. She didn't know but was also concerned as she gotten the same email from Charles and had tried to get through to him, but couldn't reach him.
The minutes ticked up as I tried to return to my work activities, but I couldn't concentrate. Then my phone rang and it was the VRS relay with a call from Charles. Even when the interpreter was causally relaying Charles question of "How are you?" I was wondering what the hell had happened to my daughter.
Charles broke the news that though there would be no valedictorian for her class, she was selected by the high school staff at CSDF to be one of the class speakers. He said when they told Miranda, she was very excited. Charles went on to explain that there would be one other student speaker and that Miranda has been asked to prepare a 5-7 minute speech. I said, "Wow, that's great news." (I was relieved more than elated.)
After I got off the phone with Charles, I check to see if had received an email from Randi. I had. All she said in response to my "What's up?" was a terse "What do you mean?" I responded with a "I just heard from Charles Farr that you are going to be a speaker at your graduation. Congratulations! Tell more." She did not. It's been several days and I'm still waiting to hear more...but I'm sure she'll give a good speech.
The moral of this experience is...everybody say it with me: Don't jump to conclusions!
(The above photo of Miranda was taken by Barbie Dike Photograpy.)
Monday, May 18, 2009
CSDF's Cal News -The Spring Play Issue
The Cal News arrived in my mailbox today. It's CSDF's school newsletter. The main story was about the spring play "...and the Story must go on..." There are some great photos of the show. My daughter Miranda is in a couple and there is a short article titled "Interview with Randi Medugno, actress" that is a must read...if I say so myself.
Check it out here:
Cal News - May 8, 2009 Issue
Check it out here:
Cal News - May 8, 2009 Issue
Wednesday, May 6, 2009
Email Exchange with Miranda RE: Prom
On Sun, 3 May 2009 11:50 am, Richard Medugno wrote: What are you doing today? Want to go with me to a baby's birthday party? It's a 1 pm. Love, Dad
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 11:53:58 AM
awwwww. I wish I could go. but I will need to do some errands before the crazy week which will begin tomorrow.
On Sun, 3 May 2009 11:57 am, Richard Medugno wrote: No problem. Why a "crazy" week? Love, Dad
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 11:57:33 AM
prom!
On Sun, 3 May 2009 12:00 pm, Richard Medugno wrote: No problem. The prom is cancelled. Dr. K. told me. ;-)
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 12:01:27 PM
hahaha. that'd be my nightmare.
On Sun, 3 May 2009 12:14 pm, Richard Medugno wrote: Yeah! Swine Flu!! No prom. Sorry, girls! :-)
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 12:14:58 PM
isn't that your most wonderful dream? :)
(I could not respond to that. )
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 11:53:58 AM
awwwww. I wish I could go. but I will need to do some errands before the crazy week which will begin tomorrow.
On Sun, 3 May 2009 11:57 am, Richard Medugno wrote: No problem. Why a "crazy" week? Love, Dad
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 11:57:33 AM
prom!
On Sun, 3 May 2009 12:00 pm, Richard Medugno wrote: No problem. The prom is cancelled. Dr. K. told me. ;-)
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 12:01:27 PM
hahaha. that'd be my nightmare.
On Sun, 3 May 2009 12:14 pm, Richard Medugno wrote: Yeah! Swine Flu!! No prom. Sorry, girls! :-)
From: RandÃ
To: Richard Medugno
Sent: Sunday, May 3, 2009 12:14:58 PM
isn't that your most wonderful dream? :)
(I could not respond to that. )
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Miranda Goes Camping
Tonight is one of those nights were a parent doesn't sleep so soundly. My 17-year-old deaf daughter went camping with three of her 18-year-old deaf girlfriends without parental supervision. When I first heard about this plan and was asked permission, I postponed making a decision. I thought it wouldn't happen.
When Miranda came back to me a week later asking again for permission, I asked for more details. I need specifics. She didn't supply any for days, which lulled me into thinking the great plan had fallen through. No, decision need to be made. Then a couple of days ago I got the text message that said basically I'm going camping for two days and one night with three girls on Wednesday in Santa Cruz. She provided details. Ugh. The decision had been made. If I could think of a good reason, other than I won't get any rest until I know you home safe, I would have employed it to dissuade her. But I didn't have one and, no gut instinct, psychic-messaging to even irrationally base a "no" upon. So she and her girls went. Now awaiting word that all's well.
Of course, I'm sending out good vibes to the universe and hoping that this mini-adventure for these girls, as they push the boundaries of their independence, goes without a big problem. Little problems are fine. That's how they learn and feel confident that they can succeed in the big, wide world, by meeting and overcoming the challenges...Just no big ugly problems tonight, please. That is my prayer as I lay me down to sleep tonight.
When Miranda came back to me a week later asking again for permission, I asked for more details. I need specifics. She didn't supply any for days, which lulled me into thinking the great plan had fallen through. No, decision need to be made. Then a couple of days ago I got the text message that said basically I'm going camping for two days and one night with three girls on Wednesday in Santa Cruz. She provided details. Ugh. The decision had been made. If I could think of a good reason, other than I won't get any rest until I know you home safe, I would have employed it to dissuade her. But I didn't have one and, no gut instinct, psychic-messaging to even irrationally base a "no" upon. So she and her girls went. Now awaiting word that all's well.
Of course, I'm sending out good vibes to the universe and hoping that this mini-adventure for these girls, as they push the boundaries of their independence, goes without a big problem. Little problems are fine. That's how they learn and feel confident that they can succeed in the big, wide world, by meeting and overcoming the challenges...Just no big ugly problems tonight, please. That is my prayer as I lay me down to sleep tonight.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
When I Wrote "A True Apology"...
When I wrote "A True Apology," I was thinking of Dack Virnig as the ideal actor to play the part of the Deaf young man who has run over his blind mother's seeing eye dog. I hope one day I get the pleasure of seeing him play this role. Dack played the Deaf son in my play "Silent Salzburg" that I produced at the California School for the Deaf in Fremont in the Fall of 2006. He was great.
Yesterday, I finally sent him a PDF of the script. Based upon his Facebook postings, Dack is apparently doing a lot of acting at NTID in Rochester, NY. So I'm thinking maybe if he likes my short play enough, he can pull together the people to do it. I sure would like to see another production of it. I sent the script to a small New York theatre called Theatre Breaking Through Barriers a couple of months ago. This company is dedicated to giving actors with disabilities opportunities to act. Haven't heard any thing back.
The premiere production of "A True Apology" is a part of the Pear Avenue Theatre's Pear Slices new play festival and will be coming to a close this weekend. I hope to have a few more friends that have ties to the Deaf community to see it before it's all over. The Saturday performance is sold out, but I understand the three other performances still have seats. www.thepear.org
Yesterday, I finally sent him a PDF of the script. Based upon his Facebook postings, Dack is apparently doing a lot of acting at NTID in Rochester, NY. So I'm thinking maybe if he likes my short play enough, he can pull together the people to do it. I sure would like to see another production of it. I sent the script to a small New York theatre called Theatre Breaking Through Barriers a couple of months ago. This company is dedicated to giving actors with disabilities opportunities to act. Haven't heard any thing back.
The premiere production of "A True Apology" is a part of the Pear Avenue Theatre's Pear Slices new play festival and will be coming to a close this weekend. I hope to have a few more friends that have ties to the Deaf community to see it before it's all over. The Saturday performance is sold out, but I understand the three other performances still have seats. www.thepear.org
Monday, April 20, 2009
Deaf Daughter's Review of "A True Apology"
Yesterday, I brought my daughter Miranda to the Pear Avenue Theatre to see my play that I'm acting in called "A True Apology." I am playing the part of a deaf man who runs over his mother's seeing eye dog and needs his sister to interpret his apology. Miranda is the real and only critic I really care about for this piece.Because "A True Apology" is one of eight short plays in "Pear Slices 2009" and the only one that's Deaf friendly, I ushered Miranda into the house after intermission so she wouldn't be bored out of her mind sitting through pieces that weren't interpreted for her.
Since the stage manager Johana knows some sign, she volunteered to have Miranda sit in the booth with her to watch the show.
As we performed "A True Apology", I had two trains of thought going on. One was just following along and doing my part with my fellow actors, and the other was wondering if Miranda was going to get this section or understand what we were doing.
I am happy to report that Miranda did not say she was bored or that she didn't like it. When I asked her if she understood what the play was about, she said she had and smiled. Johana did tell me later that Randi ask if I really had signed "fuck" when my character gets mad at his mother for her insistence on being apologized to. She was a little shocked by this, I guess.
After curtain call, I talked to my daughter more about the show and she was amused by the idea that a service dog would want to commit suicide. The only other comment she would offer is that she didn't like the sister (Helena Clarkson) character's signing. I knew she would say this, but I explained that she'd only being signing a few weeks. "Well, I couldn't understand her," was Randi response. Later, though when she met Helena, they chatted in sign a little in the lobby.
The Deaf are like the French when it comes to their language. They value it so much and don't like to see it used improperly...knowing this has always intimidated me when I sign with Deaf adults. Anyway, "A True Apology" has gotten a big thumbs up from my deaf daughter and has only 4 more performances left at the Pear: http://www.thepear.org/.
Saturday, April 18, 2009
A Short Review of "A True Apology"
We are half-way through the run of Pear Slices 2009, and we received our first formal review (and maybe only one). It was a decent one, that focussed on the acting. This is, of course, annoying since Pear Slices is all about "new works" and critiques should be about the writing, but this is not surprising. As difficult as it is to write new works, it's also difficult to review new works in a limited space unless maybe you're a very experienced theatre person/critic.
My part of Kevin Kirby's Palo Alto Weekly review of Pear Slices 2009:
"...In Richard Medugno’s 'A True Apology,' however, [Helena] Clarkson shines. Her long-suffering character is called upon to mediate a dispute between her blind mother (played by feisty Lindi Press) and her deaf brother (believably portrayed by playwright Medugno), after the son runs over the mother’s seeing-eye dog. Insisting that she is only a neutral interpreter between family members whose disabilities leave them unable to communicate with one another directly, she nonetheless gets caught up in both parties’ frustration and anger, until she is seemingly locked in a half-spoken, half-signed argument with herself..."
Kirby did talk about the quality of the new work as a whole, summing up the night in the last paragraph of his review: "...the majority of this year’s 'slices' from the PearPlaywrights Guild feel decidedly safe." I feel "A True Apology" was in the minority then, because it was a far from a safe piece. It was a huge challenge. It could have easily fallen flat without the proper execution.
I hope "A True Apology" has a life after Pear Slices 2009, so I can maybe see a production without being in it and get more reviews in print. The real critics I'm waiting to hear from for this production are my kids, who are planning to see the show on Sunday.
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
Miranda Time, Day 2
Today Miranda and I ventured to north of the San Francisco Bay. First stop, an hour and half after gassing up in Fremont was Santa Rosa. We had a really good lunch in an Omlette place in the "historic old downtown" section.
While eating I asked my daughter about going away to college in August. I started with first, how many trips would she be making home. She said two. One trip home in October for the California School for the Deaf's 150 Anniversary and one more trip back at Christmas time. When I asked about spring break, she finger-spelled what I thought was "Puerto Rico." With that lovely combination of exasperation and infinite patience, she re-finger-spelled "Costa Rica." I registered some surprise. "Hmm," I thought, "I wonder where she's going to get the money for that." Yes, this was the thought before, "I don't want my baby girl going to Central America for spring break!"
Later, I asked Miranda about her friends going to Gallaudet. It turns out her long time friend, Shea, whom she's known since before kindergarten is going to be her roommate in Washington, DC. I don't know why I find this comforting, other than Shea's is a great kid, who I've seen grown up with my girl.
After lunch, Miranda and I visited the Charles M. Schulz museum and got our fill of "Peanuts" and the gang. It's a cute little place. Miranda admired the cartoonist's high school report card - all A's and B's - that was in encased in a display about Mr. Schulz's youth. After the museum, we moved next door to the ice rink, but I couldn't talk my girl into lacing up any skates. Some Canadian girl! We continued on to the Snoopy gift shop, as if we hadn't seen enough of Charlie Brown stuff.
We were both ready to leave Santa Rosa at 2pm and less than an hour later we were on the coast at Bodega Bay, famous for where Hitchcock filmed "The Birds." (I should Miranda this film a few months back and she laughed heartily when birds were pecking away at the top of a fleeing school boy. I admit it, I laughed too. Though I remember watching this same film 40 years earlier and being quite shook up.) It was a windy day, so we didn't stay too long in Bodega Bay and there wasn't a lot to do other than admire the view.
We headed home and got back to Fremont about 6 pm after battling 880 rush hour traffic going south. During one of those bumper-to-bumper times, I talked to Miranda a little more about college. I asked her what she expected to happen in college. She just shrugged. I advised her that it was going to be hard. She nodded. I said there's going to be a lot of pressure from peers to party. She said she knew but didn't want to discuss it anymore.
While eating I asked my daughter about going away to college in August. I started with first, how many trips would she be making home. She said two. One trip home in October for the California School for the Deaf's 150 Anniversary and one more trip back at Christmas time. When I asked about spring break, she finger-spelled what I thought was "Puerto Rico." With that lovely combination of exasperation and infinite patience, she re-finger-spelled "Costa Rica." I registered some surprise. "Hmm," I thought, "I wonder where she's going to get the money for that." Yes, this was the thought before, "I don't want my baby girl going to Central America for spring break!"
Later, I asked Miranda about her friends going to Gallaudet. It turns out her long time friend, Shea, whom she's known since before kindergarten is going to be her roommate in Washington, DC. I don't know why I find this comforting, other than Shea's is a great kid, who I've seen grown up with my girl.
After lunch, Miranda and I visited the Charles M. Schulz museum and got our fill of "Peanuts" and the gang. It's a cute little place. Miranda admired the cartoonist's high school report card - all A's and B's - that was in encased in a display about Mr. Schulz's youth. After the museum, we moved next door to the ice rink, but I couldn't talk my girl into lacing up any skates. Some Canadian girl! We continued on to the Snoopy gift shop, as if we hadn't seen enough of Charlie Brown stuff.
We were both ready to leave Santa Rosa at 2pm and less than an hour later we were on the coast at Bodega Bay, famous for where Hitchcock filmed "The Birds." (I should Miranda this film a few months back and she laughed heartily when birds were pecking away at the top of a fleeing school boy. I admit it, I laughed too. Though I remember watching this same film 40 years earlier and being quite shook up.) It was a windy day, so we didn't stay too long in Bodega Bay and there wasn't a lot to do other than admire the view.
We headed home and got back to Fremont about 6 pm after battling 880 rush hour traffic going south. During one of those bumper-to-bumper times, I talked to Miranda a little more about college. I asked her what she expected to happen in college. She just shrugged. I advised her that it was going to be hard. She nodded. I said there's going to be a lot of pressure from peers to party. She said she knew but didn't want to discuss it anymore.
Tuesday, April 14, 2009
Miranda Time
It's spring break for students at the California School for the Deaf and I'm currently between jobs, so today and tomorrow I'm spending "quality time" with my Miranda. We had planned to go to Santa Rosa to the Charles Schulz Museum and then out to Bodega Bay (where "The Birds" was filmed), but I learned that the "Peanuts" museum is actually closed today and it was much too windy to enjoy a day on the coast.
So we changed our plans and decided to lunch in Fremont at The Elephant Bra...my dyslexic attempt at humor...(Are you now picturing a pachyderm with a Playtex cross-your-heart braissere or just the image of a huge bra?) Miranda and I were seated in the exact same booth Terence and I sat at the last time I went to this restaurant.
The waitress was a sweetheart and used some basic signs with Miranda when she ordered a salad with chicken. We find this in Fremont often. Service people are used to dealing with the Deaf Community. Unfortunately, half-way through her salad Miranda discovered a dark black hair in it and showed the server. She immediately offered to get Miranda something else or take it off the bill. Miranda asked for sweet potato fries, which were promptly served. The chicken salad was taken off the bill and the sweet potato fries weren't added on. When I asked the waitress to add the fries on, she said, "No, it's okay with my manager." So our bill for lunch came to $7.95 as I was only charged for my patty melt.
As we walked to the car, I thanked Miranda for the cheap lunch. She laughed. Then we drove to San Jose to visit with my friend John and to see his two 18-month-old twins. Miranda fell asleep in the car and confessed she wasn't feeling well when we arrived. She stayed in the car for an hour while I visited.
Next stop was Santana Row, a upscale shopping destination that Miranda had never been to and I thought she'd like to window shop at. Revived from her nap, she thought it was cool and said it reminded her of Sweden. We spent an hour there, with our final stop at Ben & Jerry's for some ice cream. As we ate, I asked my daughter if she remembered visiting the Ben & Jerry's factory in Vermont when she was young. She did not recall it, beyond watching our family movies of it. She reminded me that she was only two or three years old at the time. Was that really 15 years ago? Ugh.
We came home and Miranda spent most of the evening in old room reading...and though there wasn't a lot of interaction, I liked having her around. You forget how much you miss somebody, I think, because it makes it easier to live on...But when they come back, even for one night it reminds you of the way it used to be... In 4 months, she will be officially an adult and off to Gallaudet University on the other side of the continent. In the words of Charlie Brown, "Good grief!" Looking forward to another day with my girl tomorrow.
So we changed our plans and decided to lunch in Fremont at The Elephant Bra...my dyslexic attempt at humor...(Are you now picturing a pachyderm with a Playtex cross-your-heart braissere or just the image of a huge bra?) Miranda and I were seated in the exact same booth Terence and I sat at the last time I went to this restaurant.
The waitress was a sweetheart and used some basic signs with Miranda when she ordered a salad with chicken. We find this in Fremont often. Service people are used to dealing with the Deaf Community. Unfortunately, half-way through her salad Miranda discovered a dark black hair in it and showed the server. She immediately offered to get Miranda something else or take it off the bill. Miranda asked for sweet potato fries, which were promptly served. The chicken salad was taken off the bill and the sweet potato fries weren't added on. When I asked the waitress to add the fries on, she said, "No, it's okay with my manager." So our bill for lunch came to $7.95 as I was only charged for my patty melt.
As we walked to the car, I thanked Miranda for the cheap lunch. She laughed. Then we drove to San Jose to visit with my friend John and to see his two 18-month-old twins. Miranda fell asleep in the car and confessed she wasn't feeling well when we arrived. She stayed in the car for an hour while I visited.
Next stop was Santana Row, a upscale shopping destination that Miranda had never been to and I thought she'd like to window shop at. Revived from her nap, she thought it was cool and said it reminded her of Sweden. We spent an hour there, with our final stop at Ben & Jerry's for some ice cream. As we ate, I asked my daughter if she remembered visiting the Ben & Jerry's factory in Vermont when she was young. She did not recall it, beyond watching our family movies of it. She reminded me that she was only two or three years old at the time. Was that really 15 years ago? Ugh.
We came home and Miranda spent most of the evening in old room reading...and though there wasn't a lot of interaction, I liked having her around. You forget how much you miss somebody, I think, because it makes it easier to live on...But when they come back, even for one night it reminds you of the way it used to be... In 4 months, she will be officially an adult and off to Gallaudet University on the other side of the continent. In the words of Charlie Brown, "Good grief!" Looking forward to another day with my girl tomorrow.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
We're Receiving Great Reviews!
Last night "Pear Slices 2009" opened at the Pear Avenue Theatre in Mountain View, California and in the gala afterwards, I received a ton of accolades for both the writing and acting in my piece "A True Apology."
I know this happens at every gala of every opening night, but I think this was genuine and heartfelt praise. It was very humbling and gratifying to hear. Again, I salute my fellow actors Helena Clarkson and Lindi Press, director Troy Johnson, and especially, Diane Tasca and the Pear Slices producers for taking a big chance on a really difficult piece. I'm as pleased as I am punch-drunk.
I know this happens at every gala of every opening night, but I think this was genuine and heartfelt praise. It was very humbling and gratifying to hear. Again, I salute my fellow actors Helena Clarkson and Lindi Press, director Troy Johnson, and especially, Diane Tasca and the Pear Slices producers for taking a big chance on a really difficult piece. I'm as pleased as I am punch-drunk.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Play with Characters with Disabilities Previews Tonight!
Pear Slices 2009 previews tonight. Well, it's come fast...that happens when you've only had a week of rehearsal. But frankly, that's all I needed. Of course, I wasn't very impressive last night in our final dress rehearsal of "A True Apology" dropping a line that throw us off-course a bit. We wobbled through the 15 minute piece, but we got through it. No matter what, that's the most important thing. Getting through it.
Biggest laugh in "A True Apology" last night from the small audience of directors, producers, crew and fellow actors was after calling my "mother" (Lindi Press) an "old, blind bitch" and waiting for Helena Clarkson's character to interpret; I was blocked from seeing my mom's face. So when I leaned around eagerly to see her reaction to being called an old, blind bitch, the house busted up. I liked that.
One of the points of the piece is to show "the disabled" in certain emotional situations, being mean and cruel and "normal." Needless to say, I'm really, really looking forward to seeing what "regular" folks' reactions will be tonight. Check out http://www.thepear.org/ for show information.
Biggest laugh in "A True Apology" last night from the small audience of directors, producers, crew and fellow actors was after calling my "mother" (Lindi Press) an "old, blind bitch" and waiting for Helena Clarkson's character to interpret; I was blocked from seeing my mom's face. So when I leaned around eagerly to see her reaction to being called an old, blind bitch, the house busted up. I liked that.
One of the points of the piece is to show "the disabled" in certain emotional situations, being mean and cruel and "normal." Needless to say, I'm really, really looking forward to seeing what "regular" folks' reactions will be tonight. Check out http://www.thepear.org/ for show information.
Monday, April 6, 2009
"A True Apology" Rehearsals
I have written a play about a family that has two disabilities and a big challenge to communication. The story is how a Deaf man apologizes to his blind mother for running over her seeing eye dog. A third character is the sister of the man who has to act as the go-between. It's a short play that's very emotional as they all are frustrated with the lack of communication and the misunderstandings.
I don't believe this kind of play has ever been staged before, where a blind character and deaf character are left alone on stage together. In away, it was inspired by the Deaf students at CSDF. I remember asking my daughter what she thought about the blind students at the California School for the Blind that share a portion of their campus with the California School for the Deaf. I laughed heartily when she told me that they make fun of the blind students with their canes and stumblings as they walk. Leave it to kids.
Of course, this always brings to mind famous quote from Helen Keller when asked which was worse, being deaf or being blind and she said deaf because blindness cuts you off from things, while deafness cuts you off from people. With all due respect to Ms. Keller, I honestly don't think she got this one right. I'd much rather be deaf than blind when I compare the two. How about you?
Anyway, I am acting as the deaf character in my own play because the actor original cast did not know ASL and was overwhelmed with other commitments in the Pear Slices program of new works at the Pear Avenue Theatre. Check out the performance dates and times here: http://www.thepear.org/.
I don't believe this kind of play has ever been staged before, where a blind character and deaf character are left alone on stage together. In away, it was inspired by the Deaf students at CSDF. I remember asking my daughter what she thought about the blind students at the California School for the Blind that share a portion of their campus with the California School for the Deaf. I laughed heartily when she told me that they make fun of the blind students with their canes and stumblings as they walk. Leave it to kids.
Of course, this always brings to mind famous quote from Helen Keller when asked which was worse, being deaf or being blind and she said deaf because blindness cuts you off from things, while deafness cuts you off from people. With all due respect to Ms. Keller, I honestly don't think she got this one right. I'd much rather be deaf than blind when I compare the two. How about you?
Anyway, I am acting as the deaf character in my own play because the actor original cast did not know ASL and was overwhelmed with other commitments in the Pear Slices program of new works at the Pear Avenue Theatre. Check out the performance dates and times here: http://www.thepear.org/.
Sunday, April 5, 2009
"And the Story Must Go On..." Closes
Yesterday's final two performances of the California School for the Deaf's plays went well. I almost got through the evening performance without even referring to my script. I was very proud of my daughter and how she and her cast mates got better with each performance.
I sent the tiniest bouquet of petite pink roses back via the assistant director. The rose bush that I'm raiding for these little gems is quite tall and the barely blooming ones are way at the top. I was straining mightily to from the top of a ladder to snip roses that were blooming or about to. It occurred to me that if I slipped at all, I'd fall and probably break-a-leg, which would make another great Theatre story, but probably not be worth the pain and inconveniences.
It warmed my heart to watch Miranda in the lobby after the final curtain. I watched her as she greeted her fans and took their compliments gracefully. It was nice to see her get a big hug from Dr. Hank Klopping, CSDF's long-time superintendent. Charles Farr, the principal of the vocational school, who's two daughters Brittany and Valerie played the key roles in the "Randi's Story" part of the show (which Miranda narrates about her eating disorder experience), said he thought it was really healthy for Miranda to talk about her experience.
At the cast party in the school's Elementary School Activity Center, Ethan Bernstein (producer and dean of students) and Heidi Burns (director and elementary school teacher) talked about the show and how they had to pull the plug on a "monkey girl" play because some in the Deaf community thought it would be offensive and decide that the show must go on by creating a new one from scratch.
Miranda's mother, my ex-wife, stood next to me for awhile and confessed how upsetting she found it to watch "Randi's Story." I admitted I was not as moved, but I had been warned by Heidi. I assumed that Miranda had told Brenda about it, but she hadn't. It's true that Brenda was more involved with Miranda, staying over night at the hospital almost every night when she is in hospital for 9 days with a bunch of hearing staff. It was a horrible time that scared us all. I remember Miranda saying "I just want my life back" and I said, "Just eat!" It was so frustrating because the solution seemed so simple...but obviously, nothing with anorexia and eating disorders is that simple.
But my princess is better now and I hopefully will be able to control the negative demon in her head, but she has her whole life ahead of her and as one of her biggest fans, I can't wait to see what she does in the next stage.
I sent the tiniest bouquet of petite pink roses back via the assistant director. The rose bush that I'm raiding for these little gems is quite tall and the barely blooming ones are way at the top. I was straining mightily to from the top of a ladder to snip roses that were blooming or about to. It occurred to me that if I slipped at all, I'd fall and probably break-a-leg, which would make another great Theatre story, but probably not be worth the pain and inconveniences.
It warmed my heart to watch Miranda in the lobby after the final curtain. I watched her as she greeted her fans and took their compliments gracefully. It was nice to see her get a big hug from Dr. Hank Klopping, CSDF's long-time superintendent. Charles Farr, the principal of the vocational school, who's two daughters Brittany and Valerie played the key roles in the "Randi's Story" part of the show (which Miranda narrates about her eating disorder experience), said he thought it was really healthy for Miranda to talk about her experience.
At the cast party in the school's Elementary School Activity Center, Ethan Bernstein (producer and dean of students) and Heidi Burns (director and elementary school teacher) talked about the show and how they had to pull the plug on a "monkey girl" play because some in the Deaf community thought it would be offensive and decide that the show must go on by creating a new one from scratch.
Miranda's mother, my ex-wife, stood next to me for awhile and confessed how upsetting she found it to watch "Randi's Story." I admitted I was not as moved, but I had been warned by Heidi. I assumed that Miranda had told Brenda about it, but she hadn't. It's true that Brenda was more involved with Miranda, staying over night at the hospital almost every night when she is in hospital for 9 days with a bunch of hearing staff. It was a horrible time that scared us all. I remember Miranda saying "I just want my life back" and I said, "Just eat!" It was so frustrating because the solution seemed so simple...but obviously, nothing with anorexia and eating disorders is that simple.
But my princess is better now and I hopefully will be able to control the negative demon in her head, but she has her whole life ahead of her and as one of her biggest fans, I can't wait to see what she does in the next stage.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Watching a Rose Bloom
Last night before I rushed off (I know I had all day to get ready) to the theatre for the first evening performance of "And the Story Goes On...", I went into the backyard and snipped a petite pink rose off the bush. When I got to CSD's Little Theatre, I gave the rose to one of the stage hands and asked her to give it to my daughter backstage with the message that "Dad says I love you."
I realized later that I'd forgotten to text Miranda that I wouldn't be around after the show, because I was dashing out to a "True Apology" rehearsal of Pear Slices in Mountain View. The kids' show went okay, but I noticed the pace really lagging, especially in the final scenes. I sensed a restlessness in the audience, too. In a misguided attempt to encrease the urgency in the proceedings, I started voicing quicker and stepped on a few of my fellow voicers lines (though I was close to being in sync with the character I was voicing for). It's interesting to see how important "pace" can be to a show. If cues aren't being picked up and actors are over-indulging, it really can kill a play.
I dashed out of the Little Theatre at 8:50 and got to Pear Avenue Theatre by 20 after 9, to be told my timing was perfect. Though then I had to cool my heels for about 15 minutes as another piece finished up. Our run-through was quite rough, I tried to go through most of it off book. We got through it. We have a few more rehearsals to clean it up and pull it together.
When I got out of rehearsal, I had a text message on my phone from Miranda saying "thanks for the lovely rose!" I emailed her back, apologizing for having to leave without seeing her and explaining why I had to leave. She responded with a "no wonder."
Tonight I'm going to have another rose for Miranda. And I will be there after the show.
I realized later that I'd forgotten to text Miranda that I wouldn't be around after the show, because I was dashing out to a "True Apology" rehearsal of Pear Slices in Mountain View. The kids' show went okay, but I noticed the pace really lagging, especially in the final scenes. I sensed a restlessness in the audience, too. In a misguided attempt to encrease the urgency in the proceedings, I started voicing quicker and stepped on a few of my fellow voicers lines (though I was close to being in sync with the character I was voicing for). It's interesting to see how important "pace" can be to a show. If cues aren't being picked up and actors are over-indulging, it really can kill a play.
I dashed out of the Little Theatre at 8:50 and got to Pear Avenue Theatre by 20 after 9, to be told my timing was perfect. Though then I had to cool my heels for about 15 minutes as another piece finished up. Our run-through was quite rough, I tried to go through most of it off book. We got through it. We have a few more rehearsals to clean it up and pull it together.
When I got out of rehearsal, I had a text message on my phone from Miranda saying "thanks for the lovely rose!" I emailed her back, apologizing for having to leave without seeing her and explaining why I had to leave. She responded with a "no wonder."
Tonight I'm going to have another rose for Miranda. And I will be there after the show.
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Yesterday and Tonight at the CSDF Little Theatre
The morning matinee yesterday went even better than the day before, so true to form the kids are pulling off what they do every year - taking a shaky show and making it enjoyable. My Miranda and I seem to have a little tradition going. A few minutes before curtain when my fellow voicers and I are sitting in the front rows with our microphones, Miranda appears in the dark of the wings and signs to me. I can just barely make her out in the black. Her pale hand appears, grabbing some stage light and I see "ILY." I sign back the same and tell her to break-a-leg.
My actress friend Cindy Goldfield and her boys enjoyed the show. Cindy liked how the show went from fables to real-life stories and back. As for Randi's part of the show about her eating disorder, Cindy said as we walked her young sons back to their car. "It's one of the reasons I'm glad I had boys."
Tonight is the first public evening performance. It starts at 7:30. I will rushing out of the theatre as soon as I can to get to Mountain View to rehearse my part of the Deaf character in my own play titled "A True Apology," which previews a week from tonight at the Pear Avenue Theatre. I am feeling pretty good about it despite having to jump in at the virtual last minute to take on the role for an overburdened actor. I am hunting around my house, looking for some ear plugs that I last used when I did a lot of swimming for exercise. Wouldn't Laurence Olivier do that same?
My actress friend Cindy Goldfield and her boys enjoyed the show. Cindy liked how the show went from fables to real-life stories and back. As for Randi's part of the show about her eating disorder, Cindy said as we walked her young sons back to their car. "It's one of the reasons I'm glad I had boys."
Tonight is the first public evening performance. It starts at 7:30. I will rushing out of the theatre as soon as I can to get to Mountain View to rehearse my part of the Deaf character in my own play titled "A True Apology," which previews a week from tonight at the Pear Avenue Theatre. I am feeling pretty good about it despite having to jump in at the virtual last minute to take on the role for an overburdened actor. I am hunting around my house, looking for some ear plugs that I last used when I did a lot of swimming for exercise. Wouldn't Laurence Olivier do that same?
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
First Performance - MAR 31
Yesterday, the first performance for a live audience of CSD's spring play "And the Story Goes On..." went off without a hitch. The audience of mainly elementary school students enjoyed the show and I had fun voicing the male parts played by Cary Holcomb, a worthy successor to Dack Virnig's clowning stage presence on the Little Theatre stage.
Miranda's piece about her eating disorder experience in junior high was the most serious and pithy part of the show. She makes me so proud so often...
This morning we have another performance. My old friend and professional actress Cindy Goldfield will be attending with her two young sons. Cindy learned Signed English years ago when there was a deaf girl in her neighborhood and the small community got together and decided to learn it to make the girl's life more enriched. I'm anxious to see what Cindy thinks of the show and to introduced her to my Miranda.
Miranda's piece about her eating disorder experience in junior high was the most serious and pithy part of the show. She makes me so proud so often...
This morning we have another performance. My old friend and professional actress Cindy Goldfield will be attending with her two young sons. Cindy learned Signed English years ago when there was a deaf girl in her neighborhood and the small community got together and decided to learn it to make the girl's life more enriched. I'm anxious to see what Cindy thinks of the show and to introduced her to my Miranda.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Voicing for the Sping Play at CSDF
Tonight is the final dress rehearsal for the California School for the Deaf annual spring play. It's titled "And the Story Goes On..." and is student written under the direction of Heidi Burns. My Miranda is acting in the show and has also written one of the pieces. It's about her experience with anorexia when she was in junior high school. It was a horrible experience for her and for family. The staging of this episode is powerful and a little painful for me, as I remember the events all too well. Fortunately, I don't have to voice for any of the actors in this part of the show, so I can just sit back and take it all in.
This will be the 6th show that I have voiced for CSD. I started out voicing for "Grease" in 2002. That was quite an experience...seeing Deaf kids pull off a musical. They played the songs from the Broadway cast, signing and dancing to it.
Voicing for young deaf actors is always a challenge...especially when they don't stick with the script that you are trying to read from. The core team of 4 or 5 that does it every year has gotten quite close over the years. I always look forward to this. Check out the show if you can. Public evening performances are April 2, 3, 4 in Fremont.
This will be the 6th show that I have voiced for CSD. I started out voicing for "Grease" in 2002. That was quite an experience...seeing Deaf kids pull off a musical. They played the songs from the Broadway cast, signing and dancing to it.
Voicing for young deaf actors is always a challenge...especially when they don't stick with the script that you are trying to read from. The core team of 4 or 5 that does it every year has gotten quite close over the years. I always look forward to this. Check out the show if you can. Public evening performances are April 2, 3, 4 in Fremont.
Sunday, March 29, 2009
Welcome to My New Blog
My intention is to frequently update this blog with postings about how I am handling my deaf daughter's transition from her senior year at the California School for the Deaf in Fremont to the Gallaudet University in Washington, D.C.
I have written a book called "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father" that was published in the Fall of 2005 by Gallaudet University. It covers the first dozen years of Miranda's life. I've wanted to write more about her life because, as you can image, being in high school, there was a lot more to deal with...most of it good.
Come back soon. I promise to write honestly about life with a deaf teenager.
I have written a book called "Deaf Daughter, Hearing Father" that was published in the Fall of 2005 by Gallaudet University. It covers the first dozen years of Miranda's life. I've wanted to write more about her life because, as you can image, being in high school, there was a lot more to deal with...most of it good.
Come back soon. I promise to write honestly about life with a deaf teenager.
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